Rewriting your story

Our wounds and traumas are beyond what we inherit in life. They reflect what is passed on from generations to generations, the family story, but also our own difficult personal moments in life. They are not necessarily meant to be healed or forgotten. The pain inscribed in the body physically, emotionally, and spiritually becomes over time our own architecture of compassion to relate to others and humanity at large: a window into what might become, a pathway to change against all odds, our groundbreaking work, our contribution to the world.

I always wanted to make a contribution. I embraced the world from a young age. I felt this urge to travel, learn languages. I slowly woke up to the desire to transform the collective, unspoken, perhaps hidden promises of a better world. I believe we are all emerging into a new post viral world in this life time albeit at various paces; a world which will look rather different in its outer forms than the one in which I grew up. But I trust that it will carry many of the tried and true, the ancient inner wisdoms and resources from my ancestors.

Have you noticed the re-emergence of inner powers: the power of attention and attentiveness, a renewed self-confidence translated into courageous speeches? Are you aware of the hidden courage waking up inside, kicking and screaming inside like a newborn? Could it be that having stopped your normal way during lockdown, you gave some space for the unknown to manifest and transform your understanding of the destination?

Have you stumbled somehow on the way to self-enquiry?

Leading from emotions

Today I want to talk about something controversial. When I developed my Creative Leadership Program, I had an interesting conversation with my coach about leading from a place of vulnerability. Indeed, among leaders and leadership coaches, the idea of leading through emotions is highly controversial. After all, ever since the century of Enlightenment, the mind is meant to be in the lead, not emotions. I have experienced a very different approach, which might serve the leaders of tomorrow.

Why did emotions get such a negative reputation? I wondered about this for a while and came to the conclusion that emotions, especially negative ones like anger, sadness, or frustration, can prompt us to lose control of our emotional state, hence this negative judgment. Indeed, powerful emotions can lead us to explode with little control over the consequences. Yet, have you ever observed the surge of energy that comes with anger or frustration, or the depth that surges with sadness? I would suggest tapping into this magma of energy to lead the way and saddle at the helm of our lives.

How, you might ask? Indeed, harnessing the power of our emotions at the height of their expression can prove difficult. This is where leadership skills are needed. We have that innate ability to feel the power of our emotions and transform that energy into healthy ways of expressing it. I have noticed how anger and sadness–possibly the two poles of the same energy–can be transformed into a source of inspiration towards bringing about the change we want to see in the world. It is no accident that having accumulated significant anger and sadness over decades, I came to develop a program on “Be the Change You Want to See” as a way to make a contribution to the world.

Similarly, you may be able to transform feelings of frustration and stress towards thinking outside of the box. Creative thinking and writing are often the result of frustrations about the way things are, and a way to discover solutions to what originally left us stymied. Perhaps the most challenging emotion to transform might be fear. The need to feel the fear and stay with it allows us to re-examine our circumstances rather than flee and find a different angle, likely to give us unexpected insight into our life.

Where might this transformative process lead us? I would venture to say that this type of leadership is based on the power to redirect the flood of emotions we all experience in life daily towards productive, artistic, or laborious pursuits. I might add that channeling our emotions into constructive action can also prevent us from re-creating and re-living the situation, event, or expectation that originally prompted us to feel negative. Essentially, this is the type of leadership that transforms the negative and spins it into positive by harnessing the energy of negative emotions. Could it be a way out of emotional pain? Indeed, pain is no longer fed by our intellectual and emotional energy once the energy is re-used and transformed. It quickly ebbs away. This type of leadership is neither conceptual nor intellectual. It is rooted in the practice of honestly acknowledging and honoring our feelings, leading from a place of vulnerability.