Tag: power

If you want to be a leader try to become a storyteller

 I became aware last year of the power of storytelling. Our children have a way to show us the impact of a story, but we often diminish its role: this is just a story! What a shame… Children know best.  I believe storytelling has a powerful transformative ingredient worth remembering and considering, as we try to make changes around us or within our lives. 

We often carry on with life wondering how to get out of a situation where we feel stuck. We may even give up. We may yet realize that whatever may be the situation, it is always the result of choices we made consciously or unconsciously. We may even know deep down that this realization is the best way to take one hundred percent responsibility in how we feel and understand that, as a result, we have in us the power to get out of it.  Despite this awareness, we may have lost the ability or never consciously learned how to affect change and get out of our “stuckness.” This is because we have lost track of the link between where we are and the story we have been telling ourselves. 

Let us say that you have been telling yourself that you always fail… or you simply fear failure based on past experiences; this will block your ability to succeed. But you have the power to change the story you have been telling yourself. Listen to children changing their stories to get to the result they want… it is that easy! Acknowledge that you have been trying hard and did your best, spelling out all your actions and qualities, remembering the fine moments on your path. Then redress towards where you want to go. In doing this kind of work, you make it possible for a positive story to emerge, and for you to get out of a stuck place. Enjoy going after your new story for 2020!

How to show up for life?

I often felt that you can only lead from a place of power, that you are in charge when you feel your best, and that others follow when they feel your strength. I came to realize that the point is not to project anything, but to be authentic rather than powerful or in control. The way I walk into a room already says a lot about me. If I am holding back on my troubles I will walk into a room with my eyes down, or I will smile absent-mindedly. If I am hurting inside, I will lack the confidence to be fully present to my surroundings, even if I try to project otherwise.

When we show up for life, we are fully engaged with what it has to offer and teach, whether it is painful or joyful. Noticing how showing up and being authentic with our feelings allows us to attract what we need. When we need healing, we will meet with those who can help us heal. Whatever we may need, if we are connected with it inside, we will find the places, the people, and the opportunities that we need at that particular moment. When we show up for this kind of leadership, trusting in life, showing others how to attract what they need, we become alive and confident. This is the kind of leadership that will inspire others.

You can show up in life for what you are and master the ability to make things happen, whether or not you are in a position of strength, provided that you do not pretend, and that you are able to come forth through your vulnerabilities, as much as your needs, curiosity, and passion. When you show up for yourself in life, the universe will show up for you!

Success beyond limits

Everyone knows the saying “there is a limit to what we can do.” Indeed, we all define and thereby limit our potential in the course of life. For most of us, there is power in knowing our own personal limits, so as not to overextend ourselves. Yet in principle, as we often tell our kids: “the sky is the limit.” There are so many paths, so many options, so many experiences to choose from in life that it is often difficult to determine and accept our limits. We are all born with unique aptitudes and develop personal desires which help us determine the path we wish to travel, while our bodies through stress, discomfort, and other forms of resistance let us know the range of our comfort zone. Observing when we feel drained give us insight as to our respective limits.

I have observed for myself that my attitude towards limits is usually to push beyond. I always do my best work when I get just beyond the limits of my comfort zone, where I extend the range of my capabilities. Others might thrive within their own limits, actively shaping their circumstances. Indeed what inspires or invigorates one individual may exhaust or overwhelm another. I noticed, however, that there is another type of limit that I periodically come up against, where I once decided that “no” this was not for me. I was not going to do this type of job; I was not interested in this field; I did not like this person. Each time I set such a threshold, life has a way to push me against my own limits, and I have been surprised to discover that my limits thereby change over time. In fact, my willingness to get beyond these limits has helped me flourish in many ways.

You may discover as you go about life that your limits are there to be gently transgressed. They reveal themselves as a way to smoothen your passage through life. You realize that you become a “bigger” person for overcoming your upper limits. Ultimately, the best things in life are those that cannot be quantified, that are essentially unlimited. Looking at one’s life, success could be summed up in three questions: Did I love enough? Did I give enough? Did I live enough? Pushing the limits in these regards may just be the way to go!

Presence and Leadership

“Who you are speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you are saying.” Maya Angelou

For a few years already, I have offered posts in this blog about the unique contribution individuals can make to the world and the power we all have to impact our context and the international environment more broadly. I have devoted much attention to leadership skills and self-awareness to lead from a place of integrity. I have spent much time reflecting on our unique perspectives as individuals, based on our experiences, our desires and specific strength, on how we think, feel, and act. I also ventured into the power of vulnerability, investigating how our struggles, failures, weaknesses can become our strength and how our vulnerability can be the seat of our own power. I want to write today about our unique presence.

We have all faced situations where we are called upon to help another through difficult times. We are usually more at ease with concrete actions, be it running errands or meeting specific requests, but how to just “be there” for someone is far less obvious and usually more challenging. It is a matter of holding space for someone to express feelings or simply being silent, offering a safe place. We thus become a container for someone else to pour out the overflow or simply share what is too heavy. This is when presence becomes powerful. Our presence alone may liberate others.

Your presence requires steadiness, centeredness, stability, and benevolence for another to lean in, feeling free, safe, and supported. There is no real need to talk or do anything, just be responsive without taking the lead, but still leading by allowing the other to find balance and dictate the flow of conversation. Being aware and open, you can gently steer another to find a stable place and recover his/her own balance. This type of leadership requires humility and awareness. It rests on the ability to be non-judgmental and step out of the way, realizing that this is not about us, simply allowing for the process to unfold. This is a real gift from your part; one that has not yet surfaced and found its place in international settings.